Thursday, September 20, 2007
Popcorn IS a Vegetable!!!
OK, I've been having this friendly debate with long-suffering-wife over the last few days. I say popcorn is a vegetable! Think about it kids:
Popcorn is just corn that someone dried out and shoved in a package.
Nuke that dried out corn, and it explodes into popcorn.
Corn is sold on the veggie isle.
(At least that's what I'm told, I'm not quite sure where the veggie isle is. I may have seen it once though, as I recall it had a lot of cans down it. No, wait, I think that was the beer isle. Mmm, beer. I like beer. Goes well with popcorn. And peanuts. And Pizza. Hmm, I wonder if we have any? Oh, wait, better finish this first, I'm digesting. I mean digressing. Well, both actually. But anyway...)
Therefore: If popcorn comes from corn, and corn comes from the veggie isle, popcorn must be a vegetable!
That, my friends is what they call "infallible logic". I know, I know, you're weeping with joy over the beauty of it. Even Stephen Hawking is in awe over my brilliant reasoning abilities.
Long-suffering-wife, however, well let's just say she needs a little more convincing. (She thinks Hawking's 11 dimensional theory was a bit nutters, says there's gotta be more than that.)
SO, I need your help in convincing long-sufferning-wife. Perhaps the outcry of popular opinion will sway her more readily than the logical arguments of a geniuses such as myself or Stephen Hawking). If you agree with me, post your comment below! Vote yes to make popcorn the next thing in trendy veggies.
Popcorn is just corn that someone dried out and shoved in a package.
Nuke that dried out corn, and it explodes into popcorn.
Corn is sold on the veggie isle.
(At least that's what I'm told, I'm not quite sure where the veggie isle is. I may have seen it once though, as I recall it had a lot of cans down it. No, wait, I think that was the beer isle. Mmm, beer. I like beer. Goes well with popcorn. And peanuts. And Pizza. Hmm, I wonder if we have any? Oh, wait, better finish this first, I'm digesting. I mean digressing. Well, both actually. But anyway...)
Therefore: If popcorn comes from corn, and corn comes from the veggie isle, popcorn must be a vegetable!
That, my friends is what they call "infallible logic". I know, I know, you're weeping with joy over the beauty of it. Even Stephen Hawking is in awe over my brilliant reasoning abilities.
Long-suffering-wife, however, well let's just say she needs a little more convincing. (She thinks Hawking's 11 dimensional theory was a bit nutters, says there's gotta be more than that.)
SO, I need your help in convincing long-sufferning-wife. Perhaps the outcry of popular opinion will sway her more readily than the logical arguments of a geniuses such as myself or Stephen Hawking). If you agree with me, post your comment below! Vote yes to make popcorn the next thing in trendy veggies.
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Read a Book Day
Today is national Read A Book Day. Cool idea for a day, I think we need to encourage reading as much as we can.
Aside from the half dozen technical books I'm reading for work, for pleasure I'm reading "The Photographer's Eye" by Michael Freeman. Great book, he talks about things like composition and design, how your eye is drawn through the photo. How to use color and contrast to enhance your pictures. Most books tell you either how to use your camera or how to fix your photos once they're taken. Michael Freeman tells you how to take the photo right the first time.
So, what are you reading?
Aside from the half dozen technical books I'm reading for work, for pleasure I'm reading "The Photographer's Eye" by Michael Freeman. Great book, he talks about things like composition and design, how your eye is drawn through the photo. How to use color and contrast to enhance your pictures. Most books tell you either how to use your camera or how to fix your photos once they're taken. Michael Freeman tells you how to take the photo right the first time.
So, what are you reading?
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Squirrel Stew Anyone?
Some of you may recall, some time back I found a dead possum floating in our hot tub. Well, it's happened again. Today, my wife found a dead squirrel floating in our kids swimming pool.
Courageous individual that she was, she used a shovel to fish the deceased out and give it an improper burial. In order to repay her fearless but stomach turning act I took her out to dinner.
It makes me wonder though, what it is about my property that compels small rodents to commit suicide in our watery pools?
Still, you have to admit "Dead Possums in the Hot Tub" makes a great name for a band. "Dead Squirrels in the Swimming Pool" is good but not near as catchy.
Courageous individual that she was, she used a shovel to fish the deceased out and give it an improper burial. In order to repay her fearless but stomach turning act I took her out to dinner.
It makes me wonder though, what it is about my property that compels small rodents to commit suicide in our watery pools?
Still, you have to admit "Dead Possums in the Hot Tub" makes a great name for a band. "Dead Squirrels in the Swimming Pool" is good but not near as catchy.
Thursday, August 09, 2007
Tighty Whities
Today is National Underwear Day. I'm not quite sure who thinks of these things, or why we need a day to celebrate our underwear. I also find it a bit suspicious that we celebrate underwear the day after national happiness day.
So I wonder, just what is one supposed to do in order to celebrate? Wear it? I pretty much do that every day, so nothing special there.
Not wear any? Hmm, OK if you're a hot babe like Angelina Jolie or my wife, but there are others I'd just as soon keep as much clothing on as I can (think people named Rosie).
Wear some kind of fancy thing, like a thong? Man, I can't imagine how that'd be. Every time I reached across the table for another nacho chip I'd give myself a wedgie.
Are you supposed to do something special for your underwear, like get a cardboard box to keep it in, or perhaps wash it more than once every month or two?
Well, no matter how you choose to do it, I wish you and your under garments the warmest wishes of the season, and many happy returns.
So I wonder, just what is one supposed to do in order to celebrate? Wear it? I pretty much do that every day, so nothing special there.
Not wear any? Hmm, OK if you're a hot babe like Angelina Jolie or my wife, but there are others I'd just as soon keep as much clothing on as I can (think people named Rosie).
Wear some kind of fancy thing, like a thong? Man, I can't imagine how that'd be. Every time I reached across the table for another nacho chip I'd give myself a wedgie.
Are you supposed to do something special for your underwear, like get a cardboard box to keep it in, or perhaps wash it more than once every month or two?
Well, no matter how you choose to do it, I wish you and your under garments the warmest wishes of the season, and many happy returns.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Don't Worry Be Happy
According to the Secret Society of Happy People, today August 8th is National Happiness Happens Day. According to them you should spread happiness and joy where ever you go. Oh, and wear Silver, according to them silver is the color of happiness as happy people can find the silver lining in things.
So go out, smile at everyone you meet, spread a little happiness. Assuming of course you can do so without getting slapped with a harassment lawsuit or drug off to the funny farm.
In closing, let me spread a little happiness with a joke.
A cheeseburger walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey! We don't serve food here."
So go out, smile at everyone you meet, spread a little happiness. Assuming of course you can do so without getting slapped with a harassment lawsuit or drug off to the funny farm.
In closing, let me spread a little happiness with a joke.
A cheeseburger walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey! We don't serve food here."
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Fish Pirate
Rory Blyth, programmer, Dot Net Rocks co-host, and Microsoft Channel 9 star has turned to the dark side. He's now a FISH PIRATE!
Egad. next thing you know he'll be running Linux.
Egad. next thing you know he'll be running Linux.
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Proper Estate Planning
A young single man got the bad news that his very rich father had less than two weeks to live. An only child, and his mother having passed away some time ago, he was due to inherit the entire fortune.
Deciding he didn't want to be alone, and that he could now afford a bride, he began to visit single bars. Finally he founds the most incredibly beautiful woman. He tells her of the vast fortune he is about to inherit, and asks her to marry him.
He takes the young lady home to meet his dying father, and just three days later she walks down the aisle and becomes his new stepmother.
Deciding he didn't want to be alone, and that he could now afford a bride, he began to visit single bars. Finally he founds the most incredibly beautiful woman. He tells her of the vast fortune he is about to inherit, and asks her to marry him.
He takes the young lady home to meet his dying father, and just three days later she walks down the aisle and becomes his new stepmother.
